Low Ropes, Blindfolds & This Crazy Life in General

Growing up, I was always very independent and responsible. I sort of had to be. My mom was always in and out of the hospital, and my dad seemed to be busy doing other things. I, being the oldest child, had to step in where others could not. I eventually fell into a habit of trying to do everything on my own and stressing when I didn't quite measure up to high expectations. I resisted help when it was offered in fear of appearing weak or incapable.

Then , in middle school, I went to summer camp. There, I took the first step in breaking free of my "I don't need help" mindset. For a low ropes activity one sunny afternoon, my peers and I were all blindfolded and taken to a rope that we were told went from one tree to another. She told us to find the end of the rope. After a few minutes of struggle, the ropes director reminded us that we could ask for help if we wanted it--all we needed to do was raise our hands. I, of course, didn't need help. Until several minutes later when I still couldn't find the end of the rope. As I raised my hand, I felt stupid and ashamed. Then the lady came over and took off my blindfold, revealing a large square made from the rope, with the two ends tied tightly together. She then explained that, in many situations throughout life, it is vital that we ask for help, because there are some things we just can't face alone.

While I always remembered that lesson, I didn't fully internalize it until just recently. This summer I learned that many hands make lighter work and a happier, less-stressed out me. Another thing I learned is that help doesn't need to be a physical thing: help can be a text asking for advice or a hug. In fact, sometimes those are the best forms of help a person can ask for.

Now, for the flip-side of things. As evident above, not everyone is comfortable asking for help. Often times, saying, "Let me know if there's anything I can do" is not enough. Sometimes people need you to ask, "What can I do to help?". You may need to take the initiative to be supportive, lend a helping hand where you can, send that "How are you doing?" text and follow up, and so on. Having been on both sides of this scenario, I can promise you that people appreciate the comfort of knowing that you care. Just trust me on this one :)

So here's my challenge to you today: be the friend you wish you had, whether it be during a moment of chaos, heartbreak, stress, or everyday happenings. YOU can make a difference--and help a friend learn that it's okay to not be okay and that's okay to ask for help.

And that's my story.